New Moon: Chapter 23 The Truth.

Almost done.

Twilight Saga

I've been spending quite a bit of time in this bookstore next to my uni recently. The reason is rather straight forward. I've been sneaking around, reading. Finished the book Twilight and I'm now working on New Moon.

I am quite surprised by my gradual development of interest in the Twilight Saga. Yes, Twilight Saga revolves around teenage romance and Bella is the typical teenage girl that makes me feel disgusted. The story was somehow too girlie for me. Yet, as the story develops, the darkness within started to draw my attention. The forbidden was thrilling and intoxicating. Edward's emotional struggle was something fresh yet familiar. Because of this, I continued reading.

Vampires, creatures of the doomed, have always been classical favourite of mine. Having beauty, elegance and immortality in their possession, they still live a pitiful life. That tragic beauty of darkness is simply alluring. The forbidden are always inviting. Fictional characters they are. Yet, ironically, they are the essence of us, human. They are the very creation of our imagination and desire.

These few sessions of reading have been somehow revitalizing. The thirst for a life is being quenched. Imaginations are finally allowed to run freely without being suppressed by reality. It does feel like I'm alive again. And on a side note, the book triumph over the movie. Just like what we've always knew.

FAT

I looked into the mirror in horror and disbelief,
I'm disgustingly fat. FAT.

Something needs to be done. Now.

Everything was important,
but it is no longer now.

There used to be a time when everything matters,
but now as time progress,
it no longer matters anymore.

The progressive flow of time and space
have rendered my past into an abyss of nothingness.
Under the presence of that almighty present,
my past seems to be distant and vague.
These fragments of memories
are bound to be dispersed and fade.

Nothing really matters,
time and space do erase everything.
Slowly, but eventually.

I look at the achievements of my peers in amazement.
Yes, some of them do really fly high,
be it in business, music, academic etc.
I then look back at myself,
I've been standing on the same spot.
And this reminds me of what Billy said,
"Big dreams, small steps."
I condemn my own existence.

FB Message

hey
Between GY and You

Jiakai
Goh
January 5 at 7:00pm
don't think i know you, do i?

GY
Today at 9:05am
Report Message
yalor i also dunno ujuz see u
handsome then juz adddhaha

This is one of the types of girls that disgust me the most. Urgh.

And the first meaningful thing that I did after I arrived in London was to have my hair cut.
After two and a half months, that is more than enough.
Short hair again. Yay!

回家的感觉真好

“回家的感觉真好。”

这是我在排队办理登机手续时浮现的第一个念头。
伦敦的宿舍虽然只不过是我留英一年的过渡住宿，
“回家”这念头，
却是源于心底，无比地真诚。

没错，
从小到大我是已在许多不同的屋檐下
渡过了岁月，历经成长。
对我而言，家的定义，
已从一个由家人一起共居的房子，
演变成一个能在千变万化的环境下保持原形的空间。

我已能在不同的环境中生存，
但，家，
却还是需建立在一个能让我有熟悉感的空间。
我要的只不过是一个能在风雨不测中
依然能挺立的避风港。

踏入了房门，
我很诚恳地告诉自己，
“我回来了，
回家的感觉真好。”

备注：迎接我回来的，是一个灰雾朦胧，摄氏-4度的夜晚。